Decoding Their Profile

I Refuse To Date Someone Who is Instagram Famous

I’m here to help you translate some of the more common things you see in people’s online dating profiles!


Them: “I like to go on adventures!”

            What they mean :”I really enjoy going to new restaurants I saw on Yelp and taking photos of my food for Instagram. Sometimes I go to Los Angeles then complain about traffic.”

Them: “I’m just here to make new friends.”

           What they mean: “I think this is embarrassing, but I’ve messaged like 14 people in the last hour.”

Them: “I love hiking.”

         What they mean: “Anything more than a mile and I get bored, but I like to wear Nikes and take selfies on top of things”

Them: “I want something serious.”

          What they mean: “My friends are getting married and I have commitment issues.”

Them: “I’m looking for true love”

   What they mean: “I have a very specific image of who and what I want. It’s probably not you but let’s meet at a Starbucks anyways”

Them: “Just looking.”


What they mean: “I might send you a photo of my penis if you say ‘Hi’.”


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