We’ve all been there: a promising first date is crashing and burning right before your eyes and you can’t decide if you have it in you to sit through the rest of the meal. If you’re not feeling it or the guy you’re with is just plain weird, how do you know when or if it’s okay to walk away?
For starters, we’re not advocating that you leave in the middle of dinner just because there’s no real spark. If the date isn’t going the way you’d hoped because there isn’t any chemistry, he’s into different music than you, he’s terrible at using chopsticks or he’s just kind of boring, you can stick it out a little while longer and at least politely finish your drink.
No, it’s not necessarily an ideal night out or the most fun you’ve ever had in your life, but your date deserves the benefit of the doubt, especially if he hasn’t really done anything wrong. If you’re worried about feeling obligated to stick around longer than you’d like, set up an escape plan in advance so you have a reason to leave after an hour without having to be rude about it.
However, if your date is truly terrible, whether he’s having trouble holding his alcohol, is being disrespectful to you, or is otherwise behaving inappropriately, you definitely don’t have to put up with it. While there may be no salvaging the potential connection, be sure to stick up for yourself if he’s being rude and let him know that it’s not okay. You never know, he may not have realized what he was doing and he could turn his attitude around.
Matchmaker tip for leaving a bad date: “Well it was so nice meeting you, I’ve got to get going in a couple minutes but I’ve had a great night.”
If you’ve put in all the effort you can possibly muster and he’s still being a total jerk, it might be time to cut your losses. Don’t stick around and subject yourself to his rudeness; take the high road and politely tell him that you’re uncomfortable with the situation and you’d like to call it a night early. Or if confrontation isn’t your thing, you can always try the fake-emergency-call-from-a-friend trick. Don’t worry, we won’t tell anyone.
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